A Blog · A Diary · Perhaps a Book

Unfinished Dreams

Stories about legacy, memory, and the dreams that go unfinished when people leave too soon — and what it means to carry them forward.

First Entry · Personal Essay

The Day I Understood What Unfinished Means

Written by Ben Linkous · 2024
Ben Linkous and his father
Ben Linkous and his father · Legacy Alive

On September 24, 2024 my father went in for a routine surgery. He had many major surgeries before this so we really didn't get too concerned. The actual surgery was without complications but his recovery was anything but normal and we almost lost him.

After being discharged the day after surgery he went home and his food wasn't processing right. We talked to the surgeon and they said to bring him back to the Baptist Hospital in Winston-Salem to get checked out. They admitted him — but this happened to be the same night Hurricane Helene came through Asheville.

For the next few days the hospital mainly monitored but he did not eat and things weren't right. He went back into surgery on Tuesday, which was one week later. They continued to monitor him but they were unable to give him as much IV fluids as they normally would. This had a major impact on his kidneys — but we didn't know it yet.

On Friday, even though he really hadn't improved much, a resident spoke to me in the hall. He said that they believe he should recover at home. For "elderly" men — Dad turned 72 last year — it was important that he return home so his confusion wouldn't get worse. This hit me like a ton of bricks. My Dad is not an elderly man. He is a vibrant, energetic man that has many years left with me. At least I thought.

The next few days would prove to bring him to his most fragile state. Hurricane Helene made it necessary for the hospital to ration IVs. Dad didn't get the same amount as he normally would and his labs concerning kidney function continued to go down. He was a hard "stick" and they neglected to get a lab one day — and the next day it was critically low. He had renal failure, and the only question was whether it would be short or long term.

I worked in dialysis, and to think that my Dad had gone from a healthy, energetic man to a fragile, confused potential dialysis patient in just over a week — that rocked me.

It was at this time I thought about my legacy, coupled with his and my mother's. I thought about how sometimes we lose our loved ones who still have dreams — but those go unfulfilled due to tragedy. It became my passion to carry on the legacy of not only my mother and father, but also my Paw Paw Millard Spence, a man I never got to meet named "Red" Linkous who played bluegrass, and my father-in-law Ralph Jones who loved to fish — all of whom have left us way too soon.

This is called Unfinished Dreams. Whether it is just my personal passion or something bigger, I do not yet know.

Dad is mended now. He is back to his energetic self — although slowing down just a bit. I can't look at him quite the same though. And honestly, that is a blessing.

Love you, Dad.

What Unfinished Dreams Is

This started as a thought in a hospital hallway in Winston-Salem, North Carolina, in the fall of 2024. My father was fighting for his life — and I was standing there thinking about all the people I loved who had dreams that never got finished.

Some of those people are gone. Some are still here. All of them left — or are leaving — something behind that deserves to be carried forward. Unfinished Dreams is my attempt to carry it.

This is a blog for now. It may become a diary. It may become a book someday. I don't know yet. What I know is that these stories need to be told — about bluegrass music and fishing and the way a father looks at his son — and this is where I'll tell them.

If it resonates with you, I'm glad. If it helps you think about your own unfinished dreams and the people who left them — even better. That's the whole point.

Those We Carry

The People Behind This

These are the people whose unfinished dreams I'm trying to honor. More stories about each of them will come.

My Father
Still Here · Still Writing His Story
The man who nearly left us in September 2024 — and who made me understand what legacy really means. Vibrant, energetic, and not elderly in any sense of the word.
My Mother
Legacy Carrier
Part of the legacy that shapes everything I do and everything I'm trying to carry forward.
Millard "Paw Paw" Spence
Grandfather · Gone Too Soon
My Paw Paw — a man I spent a lot of time with and loved deeply. His memory is one of the most present in my life, and his story is one I carry with me every day.
"Red" Linkous
Bluegrass · Gone Too Soon
A man I never got to meet — but whose bluegrass music lives somewhere in the family line. His story is waiting to be told and remembered properly.
Ralph Jones
Father-in-Law · Gone Too Soon
A man who loved to fish — and who left too early. His quiet joy on the water is the kind of thing that deserves a story.
More to Come
The Stories Still Being Written
This list will grow. Every family has people whose dreams went unfinished. These are mine — and eventually, maybe, yours too.

More entries are coming.

This is just the beginning. The stories about Paw Paw, about Red's bluegrass, about Ralph on the water — they're all waiting to be written. Subscribe to the Substack to get them when they arrive.